Eva Longoria pops out on Letterman

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Eva Longoria appeared on David Letterman Wednesday and had a wardrobe malfunction (what a gay term.) I love that it happened on Letterman seeing how it turned out he loved banging the interns while married. I don’t know about you but I respect Letterman so much more now that he’s just like me, horny and eff’in girls in the driveway of her boyfriends home. Any hootie who the boobie comes out at 3:21 of the video, yes your welcome.

Kat Dennings is also naked. Me likey

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Not only did naked pictures of Jessica Alba leak but the actress Kat Dennings came out with her own and made me forget about the crappy Alba pix. Jesus look at those things. Didn’t she star in The 40 Year Old Virgin? Ever since these pictures came out I’ve been monitoring her Twitter like a crazy stalker. I have no crazy comments…Just shhhh and enjoy and pretend Jessica Alba’s body doesn’t actually look like that.

More pictures below, you sexy beast

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Jessica Alba is naked. Me no like

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So the big news on the intronets today is that Jessica Alba has some leaked nude pix. How disappointing for those that fapped it in the theater to In The Blue or whatever that gay movie was called. I always thought Jessica’s body looked alot better than that. Maybe it’s because she was pregnant at the time? If that’s the case why not abortion? I mean seriously, it destroyed her body. Who is going to see a Alba movie with her current body?

More pix below

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Heidi still has it. Your girl doesn’t

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For some reason Heidi Klum released a trailer (below) for her upcoming book. Pretty amazing that Heidi is 37 and popped out like 8 kids and still looks amazing. What other supermodel is still hot after being in the spotlight for this long? That’s right, there is none. Speaking of Supermodels that i beat it to whatever happened to Niki Taylor? I dropped some serious goo in 6th grade looking at her.

Click more to see the trailer you sexy P.O.S.

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And And Twins!!!

Posted on by - Posted in: Celebrity Candids


CoCo and her sister took to Twitter to show off some booty. Now It’s a fact that CoCo has the best Twitter in the world and saying the word Twitter makes me feel like I need penis on and around my lips. Anywho I also added a video of CoCo and her sister on Ustream (below)  from a few months ago, in the vlog they show some skin and also kiss in the end. They kiss for like a half a second so it’s frustrating to keep fapping and scrolling back to watch it. It’s like watching internet porn in the late 90′s on dial-up and those 10 second preview clips. Ahhh Sublimedirectory you taught me well.

Chelsea Handler Sex Tape cumming!!! OMG’erz!!! Skeet Skeet!!!

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That’s sarcastic excitement BTW. I hate to sound negative all the time but that’s the type of person i am so Eff off. Anywho the Chelsea Handler Sex Tape is coming according to The New York Post, they’re popular so it has to be true.

“Several people came forward with copies of the video since its existence became known last May. A deal is very close to being made,” the New York Post quoted a source as telling Radaronline.com

Copies of the tape, which she sent to talent agents and managers, took long to surface, and the reason was put down to her work as a comedian. “I’m sure most people just threw them out because her stand-up was so bad,” a source added.

Of course I’ll fap to it because she’s famous and on TV and I’ve wondered how she takes the penis. I’m more fascinated by Christina Model. When is she going to go all the way and start banging guys? Seriously, the teasing has been going on for 12 years. It is kinda nice to grow up with her though. Christina Model is like the Jennifer Love Hewitt of porno. Anywho I added a video of Chelsea Handler doing some sort of sex scene for an Indie movie no one has ever seen below. Oh and the screen shots from the Sex Tape is below too.

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Lindsay disappoints my penis

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Remember the news that Lindsay Lohan would be naked in the movie Machete? Well the screenshots are here and it’s so lame, she is topless so i guess they didn’t lie. I wanted to see boobs damnit! I swear to God if Lindsay does this for the movie Inferno I am hitting the first old lady i see at the supermarket getting her apple juice. I haven’t seen the movie Machete because Alex Jones told me that the movie is racist towards white people and i can’t support a movie like that. I’m so tired of being held down by the man, who’s in the White House? A black man!..Exactly. The Black man and Mexicans have gotten together to eff us. Then again they do have a point, we kinda deserve it.

CoCo updates Twitter!!!

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Thank goodness CoCo updated her Twitter with some pictures. I learned a new fact about CoCo, i did not know she had a tongue ring. How lucky is Ice-T seriously? It pisses me off how lucky he is. She’s like the perfect girl. When she talks she isn’t annoying, oh and her body is ridiculous. I never met a girl with those two things going for her. If she isn’t annoying and can clean my house perfectly i would even take that…I’m desperate.