I woke up a few hours ago with a massive migraine, like you know those headaches where it feels like somebody is beating you in the back of the head with a baseball bat? Yes those types. Anywho while holding my head i was looking to touch myself and maybe ease the pain so i found some new bikini pictures of Shauna Sand and needless to say not only has my headache gotten worse but I think I’m turned off to all women now. Why would a woman do such things to her body? Wasn’t Shauna considered a super hot piece of of ace at some point? Sure I’m sure she was considered hot in 1992 when i was 6 years old. You gotta admit her oral scene at the end of her sex tape was super hot. She swallows so at least she has something going for her.

Was Katy Perry really naked in her video for California Girls? That sounding like a total promo for Entertainment Tonight as they enter a commercial. I really have no attraction to Katy Perry. Yeah she has a nice body and all i just find her kind of annoying. Ain’t nobody happy like that! Write a song about how horrible life is! Did you hear about BP and all of those animals dying? What about the world ending in 2 years? Yeah i guess we should ignore the fact that God is coming in 2 years to rapture us good Christian people while she’s burning in Hell for kissing a girl, and get this my fellow God-fearing people…She liked it!!!

I found the video version of Lindsay Lohan posing for GQ magazine. Be honest, would you have sex with Lindsay with the risk of receiving a STD? I’m not going to lie i probably would. I have a feeling Lindsay is a complete freak. I like a girl to go nuts and scare me a little, maybe pull out a knife and threaten to make a sequel to the BME pain Olympics. Anywho lets stop talking about my mutilated penis and enjoy Lindsay trying to seduce the camera

I’m fascinated by Lindsay Lohan playing porn star Linda Lovelace in Inferno. This is really exciting for me because i love a girl with a filthy mouth while I’m sliding my huge 2 inch over-sized clit inside her. The really interesting part that I have no news on is will Lindsay Lohan do some sort of scene with a dog? Now I’m not dumb, i know Lindsay isn’t going to bang a dog but will they even bring up the fact Linda Lovelace did a video where she actually had sex with a dog? There is no way this movie will disappoint me, so Lindsay please don’t die. Well atleast until this movie is done, after that i could care less…Kidding…not really.

Here’s some pix of Rihanna on stage trying to keep her audience happy because she makes horrible music and to further piss people off when I die i will be playing her album Rated R at my funeral. Seriously who listens to her music and likes it? Everytime i see her video on TV I instantly mute the TV, pull my pants down and wack it until my 14 inch wang bleeds and creates sores. The thought of me wacking it and using my blood as lube is more pleasurable than sitting there listening to one of her horrible songs that only gives the terrorist more reasons to hate us. Good job Rihanna, you killed us all.