Never heard of†Candice Swanepoel in my life, but after seeing her wear these bikinis I’m about to start investigating and subscribing.†Candice Swanepoel in a bikini is as good as it gets in terms of hot babes in bikinis. Her body has more curves then a tire factory.†Candice Swanepoel should stand on the corner in a bikini if she ever goes broke with a cup, selling cameras.
Here’s some recent pictures of Ashley Tisdale in a bikini with a friend who I don’t know. Hilary Duff and Ashley Tisdale are really the only two Disney celebrities that have turned out normal. But now Hilary is pregnant so congrats Ashley, you outlasted them all! Now leak some pictures, you made your point.
Keep reading for the 60+ pix
Sofia Vergara is 39 years old folks. Hollywood should seriously take notes on how to age. The first thing that came to mind when writing that sentence is Nikki Cox, she went from THIS to THIS. I never understood the purpose of any kind of facial surgery. It †never turns out well, unless your Vanessa Williams. Then again Vanessa was Miss America, later lost the crown due to hardcore lezbo pix. Just thought I’d throw that in there.
Vanessa Hudgens and Selena Gomez are starring in a movie called Spring Breakers. The behind the†scenes†pictures have been going around the internet like wildfire. Whoever wrote and casts this movie is brilliant. Vanessa is considered old, we’ve seen her naked tons of times but Selena is a newcummer (see what I did there?) Vanessa is the slutty one to corrupt the sexy newcummer Selena. Wait, I forgot where I was going with this.
Lady GaGa appeared in†Harper’s Bazaar. Lady GaGa is the perfect example why women and makeup go together like girls with low esteem and me. Girls with low self esteem is the greatest thing ever, you can cheat and tell them they just don’t trust you and it’s also simple to trick them into abortions. Anywho back to GaGa, She can look somewhat normal when she wears makeup and why all the tattoos? Is there anything more†unattractive†than a girl with a tattoo on her arm or hand? No the answer is no.
The trailer for Natalie Portman’s latest movie was released on the internets a few days ago and we got a glimpse of the Portman in a thong. Sure she’s a white girl that’s flat as a board but i don’t care, she’s wife material. I watched the movie Brothers like 5 times because she’s so eff’in adorable. I don’t blame Spider-man, if she made out with my brother i would put a gun to my head too.
Here’s some new pictures of Rihanna in a bikini on some beach. Sure her voice is horrible and she has a huge forehead but If i was really horny and couldn’t find anything better i would probably “hit it” as the brothas say. Isn’t it amazing how the record labels can make someone look so attractive on a music video? Example have you seen Mariah Carey lately? Jesus Christ! And don’t give me the “She’s pregnant” routine. She’s fat and no matter what women should not be that big. Anywho back to my point, if Mariah shot a music video today she would appear to be the same Mariah Carey from her Always Be My Baby days that i beat it to as a teenager. Come on the tire swinging scenes gave me such a stiffy guys. Eff a Nick Cannon.
So I’m here on less than 3 hours of sleep. I woke up to a message from a friend who was bored at work and of course since she’s a girl with a vagina I entertained her for a while. After that I tried to go back to sleep, of course that doesn’t happen because there’s a knock at the door. I put on my pants and answered, it was a construction guy asking for work. The funny thing is he also talked to me about God. I hate talking to Christians but i found the situation entertaining then i started wondering is this guy actually Jesus? Wasn’t Jesus a carpenter? Maybe it’s the lack of sleep but i think i just talked to Jesus. I gotta tell you the guy is actually polite and fairly handsome. Anywho after the talk with Jesus I started surfing and found pix of Britney Spears’ booty in a bikini. Enjoy the pix because I’m too tired to, also don’t forget Jesus loves you.