Tiger Woods is cumming

According to reports Tiger Woods will be making a comeback to the golf course in two weeks.

Woods is “poised to make a shock return to competitive golf” in the upcoming Accenture Match Play Championship in Arizona, according to the Herald Sun of Melbourne, which did not cite a source.

The top spokesman for the PGA Tour would not confirm the Herald Sun story.

“We have no comment,” Ty Votaw said.

What a nerd Tiger Woods is. I kind of love the fact that Tiger is a loser that has made a billion dollars and can bang any girl he wants. My plan is a little different though, you don’t marry a woman you ratard. You hang out with every girl and kick them out the next day. Hopefully Nike doesn’t fire me too, speaking of Nike you would think they could parody the Tiger Woods situation with their slogan in some way. I smell a lame SNL sketch very soon.